It’s been quite a week. Serious back injury, stolen cell phone, rush to finish a project early…. Such fun. And more silly Cam Newton rumors. Allegedly, he’s open to being traded to the Bears. Since the Bears will be coming to Charlotte for a game next year, I don’t concur. If we’re gonna trade him, trade him to Tennessee. They also need a long-term answer at QB, and we won’t play them until 2023. Now, on to this week’s games.

Pittsburgh at Cleveland (Thu) – The Steelers are on a roll, and haven’t lost to Cleveland in like 24 years. OK, It’s only since 2014. Still, the under-achieving Browns look to cement Freddie as a one-and-done coach, although they will make it very interesting. Steelers 23, brownie troop 21 

Buffalo at Miami – The Bills have stumbled, the Fins have re-discovered how to win. Do the trends continue? Uh, no. Buffalo, NC 20, Fish Carcasses 12 

Dallas at Detroit – Remember when Detroit was winning? Neither do I, but they won’t get there in this matchup. Cowboys 27, lion cubs 10 

Denver at Minnesota – Big win at Dallas last week, and they get a hapless Denver team as a reward. Sound that big, obnoxious horn. Norwegians 33, Donkeys 13 

Houston at Baltimore – Speaking of teams on a roll, Baltimore’s newly-constructed dominant defense gets a real test this week. I think they pass. Ravens 28, Texans 20 

Jacksonville at Indianapolis – Foles is back, but I don’t think he has enough weapons. Horses 23, Jags 17 

New Orleans at Tampa Bay – Two teams I really hate. Tampa will feel the brunt of an angry team that got whupped by a terrible team last week. Aints 40, Yuck-aneers 21 

NY Jets at Washington – The Who Cares Game of the Week. J-E-T-S jets jets jets jets jets jets jets jets jets jets 17, Dead-skins 14 

Arizona at San Francisco – Speaking of angry teams coming off a loss, good luck to Kyler Murray and Company. 49ers 38, Cards 10 

Cincinnati at Oakland – Only draw here is the pursuit of 0-16. Keep pursuing. Fakers 26, Bangles 10 

New England at Philadelphia – Another team coming off a loss – well, a loss and a bye. Either way, this Super Bowl rematch will have a different outcome. Or the same outcome as the first time these teams played in the Super Bowl. Patriots 31, Eagles 21 

Chicago at LA Rams – Stinker of a Sunday night game, as Chicago has fallen off the rails, a win over the lion cubs notwithstanding. It won’t withstanding for this one, anyway. Rams 34, bear cubs 17 

Kansas City “at” LA Chargers (Mon, Mexico City) – MC finally gets its game after last year’s got pulled due to a trashed field. It’s a track meet, won by the track team with more elite track stars. Chiefs 42, Clippers 28 

Atlanta at Carolina – All it took was one win to convince some talking heads that Atlanta is an elite team again and will steal a road win in Charlotte. But Atlanta is still last in the league in scoring defense, forced turnovers, and sacks. Carolina still has Christian McCaffrey, DJ Moore and Greg Olsen. Enough to put Atlanta back in its place. PANTHERS 38, Very Dirty Birds 21 

Last week’s record: 4-9

Season: 91-57

BYE: Green Bay, N.Y. Giants, Seattle, Tennessee

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