Lane Kiffin is a joke. He ends his pregame TV interview after 1 question with “get your popcorn ready” and a mic toss. Then Misipi gets blasted, making him the 256th former Saban assistant to lose to Saban. And he even had an extra week to prepare. Kiffin is the Bruce Arians of college football – the coach who will never be as good of a coach as he thinks he is. Let’s move on to week 6.
‘Bama at Texas A&M – It’s the early 1980s all over again – ‘Bama will continue to dominate until their legendary coach dies of old age. Unless the current one can be talked into going to Kent State to coach his alma mater. Neither is likely to happen any time soon. Also of note: Saban will have outlived Bryant by the end of this season. The Evil Empire 44, A&M 21
Vanderbilt at Florida – Vandy finally gets a win, then gets to go to the swamp to play a team that is probably extremely angry after losing last week. I think it’s easy to see what’s coming here. Lizards 49, Vandy 3
LSU at Kentucky – It’s looking more and more like 2019 was the outlier for Coach O’s teams. Having that super-stud transfer QB probably helped mask a few things. That being said, emotion can be carried to next week in college football, which is a bad thing both ways for UK. LSU 30, Briars 20
Ar-Kansas at Misipi – This should be very interesting. Both teams were expecting to make a national splash last week, and both were cooked and eaten by the end of the first quarter. Which one will turn the seething anger into a win? I’m going with the coach who is a better emotional manipulator. Pigs 28, Misipi 24
North Texas at Missouri – OK, what in the sam hill happened in the western branch of SEC cities named Columbia last week? Lucky for them, they have a middling Conference USA paycheck opponent to use as ointment. Mizzou 43, NTU 21
South Carolina at Tennessee – After looking like a dud for a month, UT dominates a conference peer. The Younger Beamer is probably a great coach in the making, but he’s going to need some time to rebuild the talent base. Rocky Medium 31, Fightin’ Chickens 16
Georgia at Auburn – For a long time, Auburn’s schedule ended with UGA and ‘Bama. Then the SEC went to each team having one of its paycheck games the next-to-last game. This made Auburn’s season end UGA, paycheck game, ‘Bama. In the 2010s, this ensured the Auburn season would usually end with loss, win, loss. But the decision was made to move this game earlier in the schedule, and Auburn also became one of the first teams to end the “paycheck game before the big rivalry game” pattern (although having South Carolina before the Iron Bowl this year kinda keeps the tradition alive). It’s good to get this out of the way early – the football hierarchy right now is 1) NFL, 2) ‘Bama, 3) UGA, 4) the rest of college football. The home team only wins this one if Bo Nix’s dad and Bo Jackson show up in DeLoreans. Big Ol’ Hairy Dawgs 40, war eagle 10
Charlotte at FIU – Most of the previews I’ve seen pretty much said the same thing: “Charlotte is favored, but they never beat FIU! So FIU has a great chance!” Well, FIU will get 200 yards rushing against us, cuz that’s how we roll. But their defense is atrocious, and they aren’t going to have enough time to break off enough 80-yard touchdown runs to keep up. 49ers 38, FIU 28
Last week’s record: 5-4
BYE: Misipi St
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